{"id":1567,"date":"2025-01-21T22:53:30","date_gmt":"2025-01-21T22:53:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/?p=1567"},"modified":"2026-04-06T13:19:08","modified_gmt":"2026-04-06T20:19:08","slug":"the-assholes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/2025\/01\/21\/the-assholes\/","title":{"rendered":"The Assholes"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Logline: Stuck in airport security with a bag of coke and nowhere else to hide it, four finance bros argue over whose rectum should pay the price to grant them safe passage.<\/p>\n<p>Genre: Comedy<\/p>\n<p>Page Count: 7 pages<\/p>\n<p>Characters:<br \/>\nCAHILL (24)<br \/>\nJOHNSON (24)<br \/>\nDAVIDS (24)<br \/>\nBOYLE (20)<br \/>\nTSA AGENT (45)<br \/>\nAGENT LEWINSKY (36)<br \/>\nANCHORWOMAN (30)<br \/>\nDONALD TRUMP (78)<\/p>\n<p>Locations: TSA Holding Room, Newsroom.<\/p>\n<p>Contact info:<br \/>\nSam Lyons salyons@chapman.edu<\/p>\n<p>Read Here: <a href=\"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/25\/2026\/03\/Scriptbank-The-Assholes.pdf\">The-Assholes<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Logline: Stuck in airport security with a bag of coke and nowhere else to hide it, four finance bros argue over whose rectum should pay the price to grant them safe passage. Genre: Comedy Page Count: 7 pages Characters: CAHILL<a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/2025\/01\/21\/the-assholes\/\">Read more&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":60,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1567","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-7-10-pages","category-comedy"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1567","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/60"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1567"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1567\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1567"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1567"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sites.chapman.edu\/scriptbank\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1567"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}